Burning the midnight oil.

I've been back in Sweden close to a week now.

For three days straight now I've stayed up all night and went to the balcony to see the sun rise. It's not a bad view from the balcony and more importantly it's not that cold in the mornings at this time of the year. So , you just get to sit or stand there in the garden , and watch. Alot of things go through your mind at that time , you know. In that relatively warm morning twilight you really get time to think and consider. And reconsider , too , I guess.

I think about all sorts of stuff. Past relationships and things I've done. People I've met.

I guess.. I guess that despite everything , even I seem to have a few moments of .. You know , "emotional clearity". Yeah , even people like me sometimes just stop and think about the stuff they've done. But , these thoughts very rarely lead to any concrete solutions about what I should've done or should've not done in the past. The past just seems to keep on returning in front of me after regular intervals.

Can't say it's a good thing.. But , "somebody's got to take that part and live it".

Anyway , you heard about the bombings of the London subway network today ? Goddamn , 33 people got killed over there due to some Al-Qaeda pussies. I hope they'll catch the wankers who did this. And guess what ? Me and a few others in this house were supposed to watch a movie today. It was about reporters in Baghdad during the first gulf-war. But , just as we were about to begin watching it , the announcer on the channel told everyone while the commercials cut in that the movie was going to be cancelled. We were a bit puzzled , to say the least.

We quickly learned the reason why. And guess what was the reason ? Well , the reason was the London subway bombings , "of course". Apparently the Swedish TV - channels decided not to show anything even closely resembling terrorism on their behalf when something like this happened.

I really don't see a connection between the bombings and being forced to cancel a perfectly good movie like that. It really doesn't shock people any more than a few glances of the evening news , trust me. But , the Swedes didn't see it that way , it seems.

The conclusion of the deal was , that the channel ended up showing a shitty "for the whole family" - movie called "Roxanne". It was more of a romantic comedy and I've seen it before too , so all of us in that living room swore at the Swedish channels' policy for a while and scattered at different parts of the house. No-one here watched the movie they replaced the Baghdad - thing with , since we had all seen it before.